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Sunday, February 10th 2008

2:34 AM

Anti-Adoption and Pro-Sex? How can that be?

More than a few months ago, an adoptress who wanted to criticize me for my anti-adoption stance decided to "expose" me as a sex writer -- an odd thing to do considering I've never been one to keep secrets.  Quite the opposite; I like my job, I've had fun writing about sex and giving sex toys advice, and most people who know me know what I do at work. Those who don't know, don't know simply because it hasn't come up.  My main journal links to the adult toy site for which I write regularly, and I list my occupation online wherever its relevant.

Is it odd to be a sex positive feminist and an anti-adoption activist?  Maybe -- or at least it might seem odd to someone whose sexual experiences didn't work out as intended (in an adoptress' case, perhaps sex lost its joy when it failed to produce a wanted baby).  I've certainly never had that problem! 

Regardless, I'm insulated in my little circle of friends, where there is a healthy attitude toward both sex and adoption.  And by a healthy attitude toward adoption, of course I mean a great deal of skepticism.  I can't see myself ever forming a serious relationship or friendship with someone who didn't understand how important it is to prevent adoption

So yes, I am a sex writer.  And a mom, and an activist, and a liberal, and a fighter for reproductive freedom, and a zillion other things that I love being.  Shout it from the rooftops.  I do! 

 
5 Comment(s).

Posted by Cindy Kennedy:

What makes you assume that people who adopt children can't have any? Many people who already have bio children do adopt. Many people don't know or care if they can get pregnant, they would rather adopt instead. Why? I don't really know, ask them.

I would never consider adoption, but I find your swipe at infertiles to be, well, in poor taste and somewhat pathetic.

Watch the stereotypes. After all, you wouldn't want someone to think you are some kinky freak because of your sex toy business, would you?
Sunday, April 20th 2008 @ 3:41 PM

Posted by Mike Marek:

Dear Mrs.Delbalzo, I am doing reasearch about adoption.I am an adoptee myself and 4 months ago my ex girlfriend relinquished my daughter Savannah to some rich family via independant adoption.I am fighting to get her back but I'm losing. I do have a lawyer. But this process is exensive and they are seeminly going to run me out of resources before I can get my daughter back.I appreciated your articles online and was wondering if you had any ideas or if you would mind my using some of your thoughts more elequently written than my own as part of my court case.I have the same thoughts just not written so well. My phone number is 707-274-7043 in lucerne ca If you have time or any ideas Id love to hear them thank you
Friday, May 2nd 2008 @ 2:11 PM

Posted by Mary:

Just as women feel they aren’t obligated to have children for those who can’t have them, I also feel that infertiles are not obligated to adopt the children of those who can’t raise them.

It is not my problem that people out there have sex irresponsibly and give birth to babies they can’t support. So quit telling me to “just adopt”. Either support the child you bring into the world, or learn to keep your legs together. Thank you.
Thursday, August 14th 2008 @ 2:43 PM

Posted by linhsey grubbs:

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Sunday, May 3rd 2009 @ 1:40 PM

Posted by happily adopted:

I take great comfort in knowing that you and your nonesense will have no effect whatsoever in the long run.
It's unbelievable how ignorant you sound in your articles and blogs. To make such ridiculous blanket statements is just ludicrous. Just within my own circle I know of plenty happily adopted children. I am one. Adoption doesn't cause psycchological problems. I mean, clearly. You're not adopted and you have plenty of them.
Monday, May 11th 2009 @ 4:45 PM

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